Like it or not office bullying does go on and it can be very draining for anyone who is being bullied and life can seem very hard. But what on earth do you do if the person bullying you is your boss? How can you stop them from bullying you, after all they are more senior within the company?

Well, the first thing that you should do is talk to someone. If your company has a union representative then talk to him or her. If you have a Human Resources Officer, talk to them. If all else fails then talk to other colleagues: remember that if you are being bullied, then they may also be experiencing it and someone needs to speak up.

Keep a note of all incidents that you think constitute bullying. Then arrange to see your manager. Due to the fact that this is likely to be very difficult for you it may help to ask a friend or colleague or someone you trust in the company to attend this meeting with you for some moral support.

Outline to your boss what effect his or her behaviour has had on you and ask them to refrain from bullying you.

If this is all too difficult, then you could write an email or a letter to your boss, outlining the effects of their bullying and you also need to tell them either in the meeting, or in the email, that if they do not stop bullying you, you will be taking this further through the internal grievance procedure, or, if you feel that you have no other option but to leave, due to the bullying, that you will be seeking legal advice.

Usually bullying stops after this. But if it does not, then sign up with a recruitment agency, get another job lined up, hand in your notice and cite your boss’s bullying as the reason for you leaving. Then seek expert legal advice as to how to progress this.

Ok, so after we all left school, we move into the workplace and feel relieved that we have left childish things behind us. No more childish games being played, no more bullying, no more nasty little comments made or having to fit in with the ‘In’ crowd. That’s how it works isn’t it?

Well sadly, the answer to that question is a resounding No. Unfortunately bullying takes place in every part of Society and that includes the office. Bullies often prey on people they think won’t answer back or who don’t have the confidence to fight back. They are a bit like birds of prey who pounce on those who are less able to put up a good defence.

Try to avoid getting caught up in office politics or becoming too friendly with the management team: if you are seen as ‘sucking up to the boss’ or participating in gossip and backstabbing, then you can leave yourself vulnerable to being preyed on by a bully. But if you do get ‘picked on’ then you need to take action.

Indeed, the best way that you can ‘deal’ with the office bully is to make sure that you stand up to them right from the start. If they make a small, even insignificant comment, which you think is made to make a point, ask them what they mean by it. If they make comments about the way that you dress, your appearance or even your work, ask them what they mean by that, is there a problem? Do they want to sit down with you and perhaps a member of the management team, to see if you can sort it out?

If you don’t have the confidence to do this, then tell someone straight away if you feel you are getting picked on. If you just put up with it, this will be like oxygen to the bully and they will grow ever more daring. And your confidence will continue to be sucked out of you, until you end up suffering from stress and feeling burnt out. Getting to this stage is bad news, because it means that your chances of getting into another good job are remote and whilst recruitment agencies are very good, they cannot work wonders, so don’t let the bullies get to you in the first place.

Office politics can seem like a harmless activity. After all, isn’t there something fun about standing by the water dispenser having a good old gossip with a colleague? Well, it can seem tempting, but the reality is that it can often turn from harmless comments into full scale bullying. And remember that other people may be talking about you in your absence, so office politics can often be something that is not pleasant and can cause many people to feel stressed at work. Or people find that it gets so bad that they have to leave their jobs in a hurry, desperately taking the first opportunity that a recruitment agency finds for them.

So how do you avoid office politics? Well the best way to avoid getting drawn into office politics is to refuse to be drawn into any politics or back stabbing that is going on. Don’t join in with any comments or impart any confidences that have been told to you. When colleagues try to drag you in and ask for your comment on something, simply smile and say something non-committal and non-judgemental. Eventually they should get the message that you just aren’t into the kind of gossiping and games that they are into.

The office is basically like a smaller version of the outside world so you have good people, bad people, nosy people and in short, all kinds of people who have been thrown together for work. But that doesn’t mean that you have to be bosom buddies with everyone, you can still get on with people, but you don’t have to be the person that the whole office revolves around. Keeping your distance, whilst still being professional, warm and friendly, just not into gossip or talking about colleagues and other staff behind their backs, will help you to avoid the pitfalls that can occur when people engage in office politics without thinking of the consequences.